Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Invasion of Hot Aliens

Gaila – Star Trek 2009

Home Planet: Orion
J.J. Abrams admits he wasn’t big on the original Star Trek series as a youngster, but he delivered exactly the kind of fan service Trekkies, Trekkers and casual Trek followers love in the form of Gaila: gorgeous, busty and green.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Serleena – Men in Black 2

Home Planet: Kylothia
Serleena rides around the universe in a spaceship no bigger than J’s Noisy Cricket – but since when does size count? It’s all about packing a punch, and the part-plant, part-Victoria Secret model can vine whip any measly human out of her path in a matter of seconds. Must be the fertilizer.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Kara Zor-El – Supergirl

Home Planet: Krypton (in the pocket of trans-dimensional space known as Argo City)
Kara Zor-El took on the identity of Supergirl and arrived on Earth in hopes of finding the magical Omegahedron, but little did she realize she also gave hopes to an entire world. With both a male and female Kryptonian on the planet, the chances of getting laid by someone with superpowers doubled!
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Princess Aura – Flash Gordon

Home Planet: Mongo
Aura doesn’t wear massive amounts of eye shadow to up her weight class. No, it’s to get with everyone on Mongo and its outlying satellites. She juggles Flash, Prince Barin, probably Zarkov off-screen at some point. Wouldn’t be surprising. Oh, don’t think of this as judgment – I’m just jealous.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Princess Neytiri – Avatar

Home Planet: Pandora
We thought fanciful braids were just for chicks until we realized the Na’vi use them to “connect” to one another. Then again, they also use them to “connect” to horses…whatever, kinky’s fine.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Jenny – Doctor Who

Home Planet: Messaline
Jenny is the closest the Doctor has come to procreating, having been rapidly grown by the soldiers of Messaline using the time travelers DNA. Whether this makes her a true Time Lord is up for debate, but the girl houses the race’s trademark two hearts, which means she’ll at least have a whole lot of lovin’ to give.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Kitty – Cocoon

Home Planet: Antarea
Skinny dipping is ten times more fun when you’re doing it with a former resident of Atlantis in a pool of energized lifeforce. Don’t be afraid of the glow, it’s natural!
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Diva Plavalaguna – The Fifth Element

Home Planet: Unknown
The operatic alien serves multiple purposes aboard the luxury space cruise hovering above Fhloston Paradise, but it wasn’t her rendition of “Oh, giusto cielo!…Il dolce suono” that put a bullet through her head. Unfortunately, Diva was also entrusted with the four existing elements, making her blue blood a target of the Mangalores. The old saying is true: it’s all over when the blue, tentacled woman sings.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Trance Gemini – Andromeda

Home Planet: Vedran Sun
Trance is the George Washington Carver of the Andromeda Ascendant, acting as the chief’s evironmental officer and chief biologist. Unlike George Washington Carver, Trance was born from a sun and can turn herself into pure energy and unleash her own personal supernova. At least, I don’t recall hearing George Washington Carver having that particular ability.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

T’Pol – Star Trek: Enterprise

Home Planet: Vulcan
She’s sworn to protect the human race, including creating the first human/Vulcan hybrid. You already know she’s down for some human love.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Teela – Masters of the Universe

Home Planet: Eternia
It was hard to carve out space in a movie packed with He-Man’s excessively bulked-up muscles and Courtney Cox’s giant hair-do, but Teela stands out as a go-to warrior and friend. She’s no Battle Cat, but the smile more than makes up for it.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Dejah Thoris – John Carter of Mars

Home Planet: Mars
The love interest of the title character in Edgar Rice Burroughs’s John Carter of Mars, Dejah Thoris is a Martian princess who would seem equally at home as a Conan damsel in distress. Oh, and her people wear no clothes. Hello, early twentieth century literary gratuity!
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Xev/Zev Bellringer – Lexx

Home Planet: Lexx
Zev Bellringer (later to become “Xev” after a death and resurrection) begins her journey on Lexx by being imprisoned and sentenced to becoming a love slave. The transition process gets as far as modifying her body, but a roaming lizard creature breaks the machine before Zev’s mind can be rewritten. As a bonus, her DNA fuses with the lizard’s, turning her into a highly libidinous and extremely conflicted space girl with disturbing reptilian superpowers. Originally played by Eva Habermann and later – after the “Xev” transition – Xenia Seeberg.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Galaxina – Galaxina

Home Planet: Unknown (possibly Australia)
Knowing how the world works, expect the first major advancement in the technology of public-use robotics to be related to porn. They’ve got the money. While we wait, indulge in Galaxina, a robot/alien played by Playboy playmate Dorothy Stratten.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Dame Vaako – Chronicles of Riddick

Home Planet: Helion Prime
Dame Vaako is the Hilary Clinton of Necromongers. While her husband takes the power position, she stands in the background and plays puppetmaster – and she looks pretty sexy doing it. Moreso than say, Hilary Clinton.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Padme Amidala – Star Wars Prequel Trilogy

Home Planet: Naboo
She’s an angel……or just a kick-ass queen who doesn’t take sh*t from the Trade Federation or her pissy Jedi husband. She’s a take-charge lady, ready to rock the mid-riff and blaster combo when necessary. You don’t find many of those in galaxies far, far, away.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Jadzia Dax – Star Trek: Deep Space Nine

Home Planet: Trill
Any woman adept at Ferengi tongo is good in our book. Jadzia is the eigth host of the Dax symbiote, meaning she carries seven lifetimes worth of memories in her noggin. As long as the Dax symbiote isn’t some weird STD we can pick up, I’m big fan of this Trill hottie.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Sil – Species

Home Planet: Earth, but her DNA is otherworldly
Scientists, they never learn. Ben Kingsley and team splice DNA found in a SETI transmission to disasterous results: they create a beautiful, sex-driven woman. Why are all the good women in this world genetically mutated aliens look to breed?! GEEZ.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Inara Serra – Serenity

Home Planet: Sihnon
One day, all female aliens will be played by Morena Baccarin. In Firefly/Serenity, Baccarin played Inara, a companion (like an even classier Geisha) who helped Captain Mal out of some of his stickier situations. Since they were romantically connected, Inara probably helped Mal get in to some of his stickiest situations (ew, gross).
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Alice – Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Home Planet: Cybertron
In Transformers 2, Michael Bay finally found a way to fuse the two things he loves most: destructive technology and gorgeous, tan women. The two passions fuse into the Terminatrix-esque Decepticon Alice, who will quickly French Kiss any guy to the grave.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Anna – V

If aliens are meant to be so intelligent, then why do they seem to consistently send leaders to Earth who have massive bulging foreheads, spindly fingers and flabby green bellies? Send a leader that looks like V’s Anna, and you’ll have the world’s leaders in the palm of your extraterrestrial hand. There’s no way Obama and the boys could resist succumbing to her naughty short haired sexiness!
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Leeloo – The Fifth Element

Underrated sci-fi epic The Fifth Element featured a ditzy, tough as hell, red-headed alien babe as its protagonist. Played by Mila Jovovich, Leeloo spent a satisfyingly large amount of time showing just enough skin to get us all warmed up, and not so much that we couldn’t watch it when we were 12.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

Caprica Six – Battlestar Galactica

Who would have ever thought there could be a redeeming feature to the world’s most, er, earnest sci-fi franchise? Sure, Battlestar Galactica had its moments back in the day. But there was only so much of the same shot of plastic models fighting in space one could take before throwing an implement at the TV due to perilous levels of boredom. Then the new series appeared with improved scripts and Tricia Helfer’s barely clad space globes, and all of a sudden we were addicted again. She might technically be a robot, but she’s certainly not made from metal, and she’s definitely not from Earth. What’s more, there are thousands of identical copies of her.
Invasion of Hot Aliens

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